A Timely Tipple

There is something about All Hallow's Eve that just begs for a hot beverage that both warms and cheers. Every year on this day we have a tradition of brewing up a batch of hot buttered rum. It is the perfect potation to fortify one for the rigors of going door to door in unpleasant weather. Now, if you are anything like me, the idea of drinking something that contains straight butter may be off putting at first. My husband definitely led the charge on this one, but now I am a believer. I especially enjoy this drink if I am the one sitting on the porch dispensing the candy; its great to nurse on a cold night, as the heat gently transfers to hands and belly. Most of the hot buttered rum recipes out there in internet land are fairly similar; I like this site because it includes a single serving recipe and proportions for a crowd.

Let budget, taste, and tolerance be your guide.

Another good option, especially if you need a bit more energy, is a good ol' Irish coffee. In case you don't know how this works, it's very simple. Just brew some strong coffee, pour into a small glass (5-6 oz), add some Irish whiskey, a teaspoon of sugar, and a layer of fresh cream on the top. Don't stir it; just drink through the layer of cream for the best experience. If you want more visuals and detailed explanation, look here.

An Irish coffee is usually served in a mug like this, but feel free to improvise...

like this, for example. 

And one final option, caffe or espresso corretto, which literally means "correct" (as in "proper", though some say it means "corrected", how audacious. Let me know if you really know). This last one is super easy: one or two shots espresso with one shot of alcohol. The most commonly used liquor in Italy is grappa (an Italian grape based brandy), but you can also use sambuca (anise flavored), cognac, or any other type of brandy. Serve the espresso in a small cup, accompanied by a shot glass with the liquor of your choice. Tip the liquor into the espresso, and salute!

soon to be espresso corretto alla cognac

Manic Monday Giveaway

Sorry, I am not giving away the 1986 Bangles album. Or should I be apologizing?  I want to make your Monday a bit better than maybe it already is, so I have two things that never fail to cheer me: a little love story and a good book. The two are connected; just hang in there, you'll see.

Today's giveaway is a beautiful collectible 1973 copy of Graham Greene's book The Honorary Consul.  Some of my readers might recognize Greene as the author of Brighton Rock (hopefully you are familiar with the literary version, not the cinematic). This British playwright, author, and critic was very prolific, and at times, controversial. If you Google his name you will likely find a mix of praise and condemnation, articles hailing the Catholicity of his writing and articles blasting his promiscuous life. As with most extremes, there is some truth. Greene was a Catholic convert, he did include many Catholic themes and characters in his writing, and yes, parts of his life were dissolute and politically questionable. From my reading of his works, Greene seemed to know the truth about life, a truth which he struggled to live up to it in his personal life. It is this very tension between spirit and flesh that seems to give dynamism to much of his work. That being said, The Honorary Consul is one of his less "Catholic" novels and may be termed a tragic thriller.  Please check out any of his works if you enjoy literature, philosophy, theology, politics, or humanity. So, that should cover about, well, everyone.

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Okay, I know you really are more interested in the love story. My first introduction to Graham Greene occurred six years ago. Let me set the stage. It was mid way through my senior year of college. I was single (hard to believe, I know).  I had just returned from Christmas break at home with my family in Indiana and a friend of mine invited me over. He said he had a little something for me since he had missed my birthday (Dec 21).

Now, this friend, who was a grad student, had been my friend for almost two years. We were friends, just friends, but I was starting to feel a little bit uncomfortable, starting to feel like maybe he was a little more interested in me than I was in him. Maybe a lot more interested. Throughout our (very casual) friendship we had dated others, and looking back on it now, our friendship mainly consisted of him being very helpful to me. Helping me move, helping me go to Florida for spring break to see a friend, even helping me by introducing me to someone I had a "crush from afar" on (but that's a much longer and slightly more embarrassing story, so, another time!). When home over break, I had resolved to tell him that we just couldn't hang out any longer, that it just wasn't fair to him. I cringed at the thought of this, because I did enjoy his company, and he was so helpful, and fun, and attractive, but I had to do what [I thought] was right.

Well, I went over to his place and he presented me with my birthday gift: a sampler pack of Unibroue beer (all the way from Quebec City) and two books by Graham Greene, The Power and the Glory, and The Heart of the Matter.  In one deft act he gave a nod of recognition to so many elements of my personality - my love for good drinks and foreign places, my desire for new things and experiences, my guilty pleasure of high ABV beers, my love of reading and learning, my thirst for cultivation and philosophical understanding, and my Catholicism, which stands at the very core of who I am... And I couldn't do it. I couldn't tell him.

{Simple Heart Photography}

The End.

Oh, yeah, don't forget to enter the giveaway. If you have any difficulties doing so, please leave me a comment and I'll see what I can do.

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Feelin' Fabulous Friday

So last Friday I saw this post, via Camp Patton, and I was inspired to give it a go. The fabulous outfit you are about to lay eyes on is not so much a Friday day look (playing with three kids outside - can you say "boots beige no longer"?) but a "it's Friday date night" look. I actually wore this for the husband's birthday date last month. And without further ado...

Don't you love these awesome pointy toed leather boots?

Torso (What's that? If the caption is gratuitous I can keep it to myself?).

First documented instance of me wearing lipstick, ever. I'm not joking. And my hair isn't red. It must be the lighting. Just trying to keep it real.

I'm a sucker for a good black and brown mix, the beige that matches the boots is just a cherry on top.

I hope your Friday is fabulous, too!

House Guest Hospitality 101

Cultures of the East and West, from time immemorial, have practiced hospitality as a divinely imposed duty. Yes, there is pretty much a worldwide consensus that it is that important. Furthermore, I think we all want to be hospitable. We all want our guests to feel welcome and comfortable in our homes. However, because of the nature of our present American culture - [for good and for ill] simultaneously a melting pot and a homogenization - we don't always have a clear, concrete idea regarding how to go about it.  Here are a few ideas that I have picked up from family and friends or discovered for myself along the way.

Ask your guest before they arrive if they have any allergies, food or otherwise, and do your best to avoid those substances. Also ask if there are any foods and drinks that they really enjoy or abhor.

Try this, if your guests arrive before or after the regular dinner hour.

Make food available between meals. Even if a host tells you to "help yourself", it can be a bit awkward to go rummaging in someone else's house! Some easy ways to make food available are... Fill a cake stand with cookies and place it on the table as a centerpiece. Load up a bowl with fresh fruit and place it on the counter. Fill glass canisters with easy to nosh foods such as pretzels, granola bars, and crackers and place them in a visible and accessible location.

Prepare the coffee pot and set out mugs and sugar before you go to bed. Make sure you let your guests know how to start the pot going, and encourage them to do so when they wake up. I love my coffee first thing, so I assume my guests do, too!

Most of us give the house a once over if we know guests are coming, but going that extra mile (if you go in the right direction) can really make a difference. Don't waste time dusting the tops of your window frames (you know that category of cleaning I'm talking about), but do make room on the shoe and coat rack for your guests. Pick up some scented candles for the kitchen and bathroom (hit up the Dollar Store if your budget is tight). Bring some greenery into the house: buy an inexpensive bouquet of flowers and parcel it throughout, or cut something fresh from outside.

Literally, those are shrubs from my non-exotic Western New York back yard.

Whether you have a proper guest room, or a futon in your four year old's room (you got me!), do your best to make it a comfortable space. In our particular situation, this means making up the futon as pleasingly (both visually and tactilely) as possible, and putting the unnecessary toys away. No matter your space or budget constraints, you can make sure that some comfort necessities are in place: a reading lamp, some bedside reading, either a bottle of water or a carafe and a glass, and a towel and washcloth for the shower. 

Carafe from Goodwill, $1. Glass from my kitchen, $0. Not having to get up to get a drink of water at night, priceless.

What are some things that you do to be hospitable when house guests come to visit? Please let me know in the comments below or email me at marytboctor@gmail.com. I would love to hear from you!

Guest Post: A Mom's Midnight Musings

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Once you see something, you can never unsee it, so be very careful with your mind and those in your care.

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Always keep a book, some paper and a pen in your purse, backpack or car. You never know when you will be stuck waiting somewhere and if you can put that time to good use you won't be so aggravated.

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Love has a lot to do with perspective. Does love mean gifts, candy, flowers? Actually, I did receive flowers once... 27 years ago... It was a miniature rose bush which my husband planted outside and then promptly ran over with a tractor, because he forgot it was there.  But my husband does get up every day at 4:30 a.m. to get ready for work to support our family. He checks my car's tires and adds oil, to make sure I'm safe. He even let my mom move in with us (his suggestion).  And as Phil from Duck Dynasty said (and I paraphrase), You know your woman loves you when she cooks the squirrels you bring home. I have cooked squirrel, deer, frog, turtle, and groundhog (twice!). There is a whole lot of love in this house!

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If you want to read a book that will make you think, and touch your deepest emotions (and cause you to mail copies to your friends), read anything by Michael O'Brien. Check out his website here.

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Mary's favorite Michael O'brien oeuvre

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Some of you may know my oldest daughter, Mary Boctor, or my youngest, Virginia Ertel, or both. They do not have the same parents. It isn't because of death, divorce, or remarriage. Its just that no siblings have the same parent (except for twins... maybe)  My DNA stayed the same, but everything else changed in that ten year span between their births. I used to wonder how kids from the same family could be so different, and now I know - different parents!

Meet Virginia. You already know what Mary looks like.

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Everyone needs a go to meal - something they can whip up in a minimum amount of time using items commonly found in their pantry. It is for those days when a doctor's visit ends up involving a side trip to the hospital for x-rays, or you pop in to see a friend and lose track of time, or college kids show up unexpectedly (and famished). Here is my go to meal: 

1 1/2 - 1 3/4 C instant rice (cooked, leftovers are even better)

1 jar salsa

1 can black beans (drained and rinsed)

1 can corn (drained)

Mix all the above ingredients. Put in a baking dish and cover with your favorite grated cheese. Bake at 350* for 20 minutes. Serve with soft flour tortilla shells or corn chips with additional salsa and sour cream on the side.

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Every kitchen needs a rocking chair. It is good for the soul and whatever else ails you.

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Similar to the old fashioned rocker that has been in the kitchen for years.

BONUS

Never, ever, ever pour cool liquid into a hot glass dish. It is amazing into how many pieces one dish can shatter, and how far those missiles can shoot. Not to mention that certain floor coverings will melt! Don't ask me how I know.

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My mom, Andrea Ertel, writes from southeastern Indiana. Her educational background is in special education, but she gets her street cred from successfully rearing seven amazing children (okay, I'm a little biased...). She has influenced me more than any other woman, both by her words and her actions. Love you, Mom!

7 Quick Takes

I skipped out on 7 Quick Takes last week, but I'll be joining Jen again today...

1

I hope that everyone has had a great week. Maybe tonight would be a good night to enjoy one of these movies...

2

So lately I've had affogato on the mind. What is affogato? Affogato al caffe literally means "drowned in coffee" and refers to a simple Italian dessert. The how to for the basic version is... Pour one (or more) shot of espresso, or 1/4-1/2 cup of very strong coffee, over a scoop of ice cream. Mmm. That easy. I love this idea Martha has for serving it to guests. As quick and as chic as it comes.

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3

Is it just me or has anybody else noticed the frequent usage of the word "achromatic" in fashion publications over the last few months? I had to look it up. According to www.merriam-webster.com, it means "possessing no hue : being or involving black, gray, or white." Just throwing that out there because I want an informed public.

4

It wouldn't be a with my sisters Quick Takes without a quote. Here we go, a shout out of sorts to the British readers, “If you look for truth, you may find comfort in the end; if you look for comfort you will not get either comfort or truth only soft soap and wishful thinking to begin, and in the end, despair.”  - C.S. Lewis

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the man himself.

5

Favorite smell of the week (don't worry, this isn't going to be a regular feature) - ripe quince fruit. I wish that there was some way I could insert a link and you could smell what I mean, but I can't so I will do my best with words. It smells heavy and sweet and fresh all at the same time; basically it smells how I imagine the garden of Eden. I didn't even know what quince was until four years ago when I was introduced to it by my in-laws. Originally from Asia, it now grows around the world but is fairly uncommon in North America. It belongs to the same plant family as pears and apples, but the fruit is hard when ripe and has a very astringent flavor, so it is often mixed in small amounts with apples or used for jams and jellies. Again, because I want an informed public.

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6

You may have noticed that I had a guest poster last week. I'm going to be having more guests in the upcoming weeks, starting with my mom on Monday. I'm very excited to introduce to you some of the women who have influenced and inspired me, and continue to do so!

7

That's all folks. Have a beautiful weekend!

Not An Inspirational Quote

So my youngest sister has been having a pretty rough week of it. I won't go into too many details. It will suffice to say that the situation involves an indoor sprinkler system, 45 minutes worth of water, and a (warning: here comes a pun, or something like it) material portion of her earthly possessions, and those of the Ohio library system.  I was about to find some inspirational quote about perseverance or patience or how suffering can make you so awesome (which I do believe), and then relate some of my own hard times, etc, etc... But then I thought about what really cheers me up, and I'm going to write about that instead. This one's for you Gin!

Nothing can bring me out of the blues like a little comedy. Some of the most difficult and stressful times of my life have been made lighter by an episode (or five) of The Office. In the last couple of years I have also realized that when I am down, down, down, nothing quite does it like a bad comedy. A movie not so bad that it's unbearable, but those that err on the side of the ridiculous, plots that are a bit over the top, that may or may not have actors who are also singers... I've selected four such gems to suggest to you for your viewing pleasure.

The first is Barbershop. Rated a lean 6.1 out of 10 by the users of IMDB (internet movie data base), it is probably the least bad of the bad movies I am recommending. Hailing from the mean streets of 2002, this comedy features Ice Cube, Cedric the Entertainer, and Eve. It centers around a Chicago barbershop and the people whose lives intersect there. Much of the free speaking dialogue is refreshingly void of political correctness and is both pointed and hilarious.

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The second is My Life in Ruins. This 2009 comedy stars Nia Vardalos, who plays a Greek American woman working as a tour guide in Greece. A predictable and corny romance springs up between her and the heavily bearded tour bus driver, who, surprise, surprise, turns out to be a veritable "Greek god" under all that face fuzz.

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Hmm... Too bad the bus driver is so homely.

The third is Madea's Big Happy Family. If you have seen any of Tyler Perry's Madea movies, I don't need to do too much explaining. In short, Tyler Perry (a man) plays a larger than life elderly woman named Madea. Madea is surrounded by family members in distress (with very real life problems); she dispenses her straight shooting advice and tough love with biting wit and many an uncouth jibe. Singer celebrity bonus - not so lil' anymore Bow Wow.

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And the finale, Wild Hogs. The most star heavy of the movies to hit the list, this 2007 comedy follows characters played by John Travolta, Martin Lawrence, William H. Macy, and Tim Allen as they defy midlife mediocrity via Harley road trip. Their trip climaxes in a biker style throw down with a tatted up Ray Liotta. Over the top situational comedy is the name of the game on this one.

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