Nothing to Wear [and How To Fix It]

The holidays are upon us, and so is the pressure to buy, buy, buy - gifts, celebration food and drink, clothes and shoes for parties and get togethers, the list goes on and on. Though not altogether unpleasant (isn't there just something nice about NEW?), it may be stressful if your budget is already tight. It's not purely a fiscal matter, either, maybe your space is also tight and your closet is bulging. And yet... You have nothing to wear!

The classic problem of "nothing to wear" knows no season or economic status, because it is largely a psychological problem. Yes, there may be times when you literally have nothing to wear. You may have just experienced a shape altering experience such as pregnancy. Maybe your house burned down. Maybe your luggage didn't arrive. Those things happen. This post deals with the more elusive mental side of the problem.

Why do we feel we have nothing to wear when we clearly have plenty of clothing? Several reasons. Maybe your existing wardrobe doesn't really reflect you. If this is the case, you need to be your own personal stylist and figure out your coloring, your body type, and your style personality. Then go through your closet with these things in mind, weeding out what doesn't work for you. This may leave you with a skeleton wardrobe, but I guarantee you that it will be 10x more functional than your previously overstuffed closet of no-go's.

Maybe you are uncomfortable with the way you look. Again, you need to be dressing for your body and your coloring. If you are doing so and are still displeased, examine your attitudes toward yourself. Are you being overly critical? Is there one part of your body with which you just can't reconcile? I knew one woman who would never buy pants because she loathed her hips. Buying shirts was easy because it wasn't emotionally loaded. Eventually, she really did have nothing to wear (on the bottom, at least). Try to love your body, but if you can't, pretend you do and break the cycle by staring whatever it is in the face. There is no such thing as a "perfect" body (in the geometric sense); women the world over have been working with the same basic body shapes since forever. As a result, there are thousands of resources, tricks, and tips out there for minimizing and maximizing, hiding, and otherwise tricking the eye. The Google, ladies, the Google!

Or maybe you're just in a rut. You get dressed and your outfit feels... blah, bored, meh. The magic is gone. Try these tricks and see what happens.

Play dress up. Try new and unusual combos. Be unexpected. You don't have to be anywhere, so relax and have fun. Have a drink. Think you found a winner? Take a pic to get a second opinion (I mean yours, but from a more objective angle) and to remind you of this outfit the next time you have somewhere to be.

Build from the bottom up. Start with a pair of shoes that always makes you feel fabulous, and work from there. Don't underestimate the power of heels, even small ones. If you don't ordinarily wear them, the visual and psychological effects will be even greater. Who doesn't have days when they want to be taller and feel more confident, feminine, poised, and powerful?

Go basic, then accessorize. Build a blank canvas with a monochromatic outfit or a simple dress in a solid color, and go "bigger" than is your norm with accessories.

See in terms of color. Lay out some clothing items on the bed. Ignore what they are (top, bottom, etc) and see if any combos really pop or create a pleasing look. Grab the items and build an outfit around them. An example from [my] real life: A pair of indigo wide leg pants really pops next to a blue and white patterned shirt. They can't be worn together because the shirt isn't fitted enough to wear with those pants. Throw a neutral vest on over the shirt, cinch the sides, and voila, a waist re-emerges. Use your creativity to make it work.

getting that "second opinion"
There is a one pic-per-post minimum, right?

I hope these tips help! Please share your suggestions in the combox!

P.S. I'm over at life in mod. this week with the lovely Camille. Check it out!

A Birth Story... Sort of.

I have been blogging for three months now - wow, time flies when you're having fun! I thought that maybe it was time for a post or two about me, since I can no longer operate under the assumption that most of you good readers actually know me personally. So, let's start at the beginning. Maybe a bit before the beginning.

I am the second child in a family of seven children. Or more accurately, the second surviving child of nine children. My parents met and married in a small town in Indiana, and ten months later had a bouncing baby boy. Shortly before this baby was to be delivered, the OB/GYN informed my mom that she would have to find a new doctor. Luckily, my mom found Dr. M. , who was willing to take her as a new patient.

Five months later, my mom conceived again. My parents were very excited; they had both dreamed of having a big family, the kind baseball teams are made of, the kind that make the bus driver blink in amazement and ask if your house is really an orphanage, or hint that your parents may not know what's causing "it".  But after only 10 weeks, the baby miscarried.

Following the miscarriage, Dr. M. preferred to let nature run its course before utilizing the procedure known as Dilation and Curettage (D &C), which most doctors at that time routinely recommended. D & C is an invasive procedure in which the cervix is dilated and then the lining of the uterus is scraped. D & C (or  "dusting and cleaning" as it was sometimes cavalierly called) has valid therapeutic uses and invalid ones, but is much less common today due to the risks associated with it and the availability of other options. Ahead of his time, Dr. M. examined my heartbroken mom, and sent her home, advising her to contact him only if she felt something wasn't right.

Fast forward six months or so... My parents found that they were expecting again. But almost four months along, another miscarriage occurred. My mom was devastated.  Dr. M. tried to console her and again sent her home without a D & C (this time even more unusual because of how far along the pregnancy was), assuring her that her body could handle it.

Days passed, and my mom felt awful, so she called the doctor to set up an appointment. Dr. M. did an examination, and told her again that it was best not to have the D & C, though for a different reason this time - she had been carrying twins, and one was still alive! The routine procedure would most certainly have aborted the baby that was thriving in her womb.

And that baby was me, in case you hadn't guessed. One physician's decision to stop delivering babies and another's trust in the female body coincided to spare my life, but I don't really believe in coincidence. I believe in blessings.

My sister and I (I'm on the right). Excuse me for not finding a baby pic in time to post.

7 Quick Takes

So I'll be joining Jen again this week for 7 Quick Takes...

1

I hope that everyone has had a great week, and that the holiday hangover from Thanksgiving wasn't too bad! For me, it's always so hard to see visiting family go. If you need a bit of cheering up, check out....

2

This link. It is a virtual makeover tool. Just upload a photo of yourself and go crazy. I was laughing out loud (or is it aloud?) as I tried hairstyles on my virtual self.

3

In the combox of Wednesday's post, a dear reader asked for a pic of my little lips in all their be-lipsticked glory (not as strange as it sounds). I aim to please, so here we go.

4

I am wearing Revlon Super Lustrous Lipstick in Cha Cha Cherry (I didn't use a filter on this pic, so the color is fairly accurate). See, even little lips can do it!

5

I am also wearing Audrey Inspired Everyday Eyes and CoverGirl Instant Cheekbones in Refined Rose. It was a rough night with the babe, so a little extra color was needed!

6

For my quick takes quote I usually choose something a little more profound, but I'm rolling with a theme here... So from another thin lipped woman, I give you, "Beauty, to me, is about being comfortable in your own skin.  That, or a kick-as# red lipstick."  (Gwyneth Paltrow)

7 

On a completely different note (or is it?), I came across this other quote that made me smile, "A puritan is a person who pours righteous indignation into the wrong things.”  Thank you, as usual, Mr. G. K. Chesterton.

Have a great weekend my sisters and friends!

A Little Bit of Luxury (or Lipstick 101)

Want to change your look, but don't have money for a shopping spree or a trip to the salon? Try lipstick. Seriously. You don't wear lipstick, you say? Even better, more bang for your buck, so to speak! What's that? You think you look clownish in lipstick? Your lips are too big? Your lips are too small? Don't insult me with that one, you don't know small lips until you have met me, or at least my upper lip... Okay, okay, just hear me out. I'm new to the lipstick game myself, but I've tried it, and I love it. Let me give you a few basic pointers, and then give it a go, please. It may make you feel different. It may be the key to adding a bit of glamor to your holiday get ups without breaking the bank.  Just try it. You be the judge.

First, pick a color. It doesn't have to be too matchy - matchy with your outfit. A better rule of thumb is to stick with something that flatters your natural coloring. If you have cool coloring, go cool. Warm coloring, go warm. If you're new to this, and nervous, choose a color that is just a bit darker than your natural lip color (give your lip a little bite to actually see what this color looks like).

Next, exfoliate those lips. There are lots of suggestions on how to do this, some involving Vaseline, coffee grounds, and other such ingredients. My favorite way to go is to use a bit of white sugar - just gently rub on wet lips. In 20 seconds you will have soft lips and a sweet taste in your mouth!

Now, moisturize. Use a moisturizing lip balm on those babies. I like Smith's Rosebud Salve, but whatever you have will work.

And apply. There is some debate out there about whether to line or not. In my brief experience with lip stick I have not used liner. From what I've read, the pros include prevention of "feathering", or lipstick bleeding into the fine lines around your mouth, and the ability to give greater definition to your lips. Giving definition to lips via liner went scarily awry in the 90's; just be aware that this is a fine line to walk (I can't help myself). If you decide to go this route, choose a liner in nude or in a color very similar to the lipstick you plan to use. You can either apply the lipstick straight from the tube or with a brush. A brush gives you greater control and you use less lipstick, so it lasts longer. I use the one from my Sephora brush set (great Christmas gift from my sister in law, Nicole, once upon a time). There are inexpensive options out there, such as this one from e.l.f ($3), or this one from Sonia Kashuk ($6.99).  Apply evenly over lips, staying within God's boundaries (i.e. don't draw a new pair).

Blot with a tissue. Perfect lips! I will leave you with a few budget lipsticks to try. I have the first one on the list, so I can vouch for it. The others have received consistently high reviews and seem to be great options in the budget category.

Revlon Super Lustrous Lipstick ($6.99)

Revlon Color Burst Lipstick ($7.49)

e.l.f. Essential Lipstick ($1)

e.l.f. Mineral Lipstick ($5, no parabens, preservatives or chemical dyes)

NYX Round Lipstick ($3.99)

Maybelline NY Color Sensational Pearls Lipcolor ($7.49)

A Twelve Days of Christmas Gift Guide: Part II

Now that Thanksgiving has passed, I bet you are ready for Part II of the Twelve Days of Christmas Gift Guide: Chic Wrapping and Presentation [for next to nothing]. You may have to do a bit of modification based on the gifts you have chosen, but here are the basic ingredients: 

Tape

Scissors

Glue Stick

Index Cards

Standard white envelopes

Red Sharpie (or even just a red crayon)

Roll of Kraft Paper

Twine or Ribbon

Optional: Boxes (again, depending on what you have chosen to give, you probably have some sort of boxes around the house that can be used)

my supplies

I am guessing that you will have most of these items in your home already, except maybe the Kraft paper and the twine/ribbon. Kraft paper comes in rolls and is often used to wrap packages for mailing. In my experience, cheap wrapping paper (think dollar store) feels cheap. Kraft paper looks and feels classic, but is cheap (you can find it at the dollar store). I have used twine, also for a classic package feel, but if you go with ribbon, I suggest picking some up while you are at the dollar store. Stick with one color; simplicity is elegant.

The How-To

Gather your gifts and wrap them in the Kraft paper, just like you would wrap anything else. 

For bottles, I suggest cutting a strip of the paper and taping it around the bottle to hide the label (see below).

For the Love List or the coupons, place them in a regular white envelope. Cut out a rectangular piece of the Kraft paper and glue it to the front of the envelope. You will be putting a number over this paper, so size it accordingly (just look at the pic below and you'll catch my drift).

Create a label for each gift. Simply cut 6 index cards in half and number them. You can copy my numbers below (Freehand, or you can click on the image, and then right click to download the numbers to print). Feel free to do so, or get creative on your own. I think Roman numerals would also look very cool (and they are easy to write). Need to brush up on your Roman numeral skills? See this chart.

the numbers. nothing too fancy. 

Affix a number label via glue stick to each gift. Et voila, it's as easy as that!

And the final product:

And a little bonus: my Love List heading.

What I Wore

I wasn't going to post today, but then I heard Grace was hosting a "What I Wore" and of course, I obliged.

the full body sans face

Sweater looks a bit bulky here. I'm not pregnant, if anyone was wondering...

accessories

blooper

The Details 

(trying to play by the rules)

White button down - NY and Co.

Navy Cardi - Eddie Bauer

Belt - ?

Skinnies - Mossimo

Shoes - Etienne Agner

Bracelet - ?

Watch - Citizen Eco Drive

And my little sis, Virginia, is here!

isn't she lovely?

The Details

Striped button down - Converse

Belt - Echo

Jeans - Forever21

Boots - ?

Bracelet - Handmade by my brother, Luke

Happy Thanksgiving! 

A Few Words on Wine

This week it becomes official - the holidays are upon us. And holidays mean parties. Whether you are entertaining or being entertained, it's a good idea to have a few inexpensive yet delicious wines as go-to's. They come in handy as a host or hostess gift, or if you are having a get together and are short on time and expertise. I myself am no wine aficionado; I enjoy a good glass now and then, and I know a bad one when I taste it, but that is about the extent of my knowledge. So, for you and for myself, I sought some advice from the family's wine expert - my husband's uncle, John Simmons. I asked him to recommend three wines that are really enjoyable, yet less than $10. Here is what he suggested:

1

Vidal Fleury, Cotes du Rhone ($9.99) 

(France)

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2

Running With Scissors, Cabernet Sauvignon ($8.99-$14.99)

(California)

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3

Matua Valley, Sauvignon Blanc ($8.99-$11.99)

(New Zealand)

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I also wanted to see if I could discover a wine for under $5 that would be truly tasty.  I came across some really promising reviews for this wine, and plan to give it a try soon: 

4

Rex Goliath, Cabernet Sauvignon ($4.99- $6.99)

(California)

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Do you have any favorite wines that balance value and taste? I would love to hear your suggestions in the comment box below!